Allowing hope

On my shifting connection to world events

Content warning: The below discusses the currently evolving news of a possible ceasefire deal between Hamas and Israel. I do my best to take care of my dear readers, and I also know that you know what’s best for you today.

It’s the morning after the announcement of a ceasefire deal between Hamas and Israel, and the day you will receive this in your inbox.

Before I learned of the proposed deal, I wrote an essay about how we consume news. Today, the essay feels old.

My first reaction to the ceasefire announcement was disbelief. How did this happen in one day? I follow enough voices for Palestine that expect hear as soon as major news is known. The post I read said, “Gaza ceasefire agreed upon & finalized.”

So I went to the broader Internet to learn more. NPR—who I check first, because I know their standards for verification—had a post updated that morning. It didn’t feel recent enough, so I went to general results.

I found an AP article that summarized the deal. They’re often the first mainstream American source to write new stories. The article used biased terms that lit my anger, but I read it anyway. It reported that Netanyahu said there were details to work out, which stoked my cynicism. I noticed a paradox in Phase 2, perhaps the details he referenced. I drew the paradox, so I could understand it.

I posted the diagram to my stories with the caption, “It isn’t over ‘til it’s over.” I’m a parent who was promised an “end” to the COVID pandemic again and again. I don’t trust promises of safety easily. I was frustrated that one of my trusted sources posted what I saw as inaccurate information. I wasn’t ready to celebrate.

And then this morning, adrienne maree brown posted:

if those most affected by a crisis are celebrating some victory, join their joy, or witness it. a journey is made of steps, a change is made by moments, a worldview transformation must feel compelling, feel possible. a breath for joy, a second to touch the grief, don’t take it - join, or witness.

She is right. My instincts are valid for my experience, and also not the way I want to approach my connection to the people of this planet. Who am I to disagree with the people who have suffered the genocide? Who am I to decide what’s worth celebrating?

So today I’m trying a new approach. I’m still doing my best to avoid minute-by-minute updates, as I advised in my original news consumption essay for today. It takes time to verify details of a news story. I want to wait until the “official” and especially the people’s journalists have had the time to sort things out. I am a researcher, after all.

But I’m experimenting with ways to celebrate and honor the hope of these days.

I’ve pulled out a book of indigenous wisdom from the place we call America. Native people all around the world have the devastation of colonialism in common.

I’m lighting a candle with hope and love and grief in my heart. Externalizing our emotions and thoughts has power.

I planned a call with a friend to process our reactions to the ceasefire announcement. We heal in community.

The single sentence prayer of Arabic people echoes in my head. “Inshallah.” God willing; we hope it happens. Although it’s not my spirituality, I pray it in solidarity.

I can be with the people in Palestine, and I can witness their struggles and victories. I can choose when I check in with the news, so I can have space for these deeper connections to humanity.

Today and every day, I hope you give yourself this grace, too.

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GSP Update: A winter pause

Following a perspective I often advocate here on Finding Out, I took a pause at the end of 2024 on my Grinnell Students for Peace research. I’ll be starting it back up as our family gets back into the rhythm of life.

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Mentioned in this issue: An early ceasefire announcement post; (for next link, see note below!): an AP article about the first signing of the ceasefire announcement*; a Bluesky post by adrienne maree brown; a book of indigenous wisdom, Restoring the Kinship Worldview; and inshallah, an Arabic saying.

*Content warning: The AP article link is to a “live update” article, because I can’t find a directly link to the piece I mention above, or maybe it’s just broken.